J Clark Ministries

One of the things that is not usually taken into account when a man and a woman marry is the differences in the sexes, aside from physical appearance and anatomy. This is very important information for all newly-married couples to know, as well as couples who have been married for a long time. Identifying these differences and knowing how to work with them in a relationship has a lot of  bearing on the success of any relationship.

What are these differences? Because of the development of the female versus the male brain, and how it is used by each sex, a woman and a man think, process emotions, make decisions, and learn, in different ways. Men compartmentalize. This means they put life situations and responsibilities into separate “boxes” and deal with one thing at a time. Women, on the other hand, connect thoughts and issues, with other thoughts and issues. Life is “more of a process” than for men. If these difference are identified, and each partner is respected and valued equally, “men and women compliment one another so beautifully that a healthy relationship makes both partners more complete.” (Source: An article by Bill and Pam Farrel, posted on the Focus on the Family website.)

Basically, men use the left side of their brain the most. Women use predominately the right side, but also draw from the left. This means that men are more analytical, sequential, and logical. Women are more creative, non-linear, intuitive, and holistic. They see the big picture, have stronger emotions, and intuition for decision making. (Source: Rebecca Shambaugh, on Huff Post).

All of these differences taken together, “offer a more complete perspective on life than either can have on their own,” says Willard F. Harley, Jr., Ph.D.  He adds to this that “the wisdom that each brings to a marital relationship raises each of them to a higher intellectual and moral level than they could have ever achieved on their own.”

There are many books written by very knowledgeable people concerning what I have presented in this article. What I have stated is also supported by brain research. As I said at the beginning, little, if nothing, is discussed about this in marriage counseling, or by couples contemplating marriage. Most often it is recognized over the process of time, and in many cases probably too late, possibly making it a contributing factor in divorces. Recognizing these differences has a lot to do with how a married couple communicates. All married couples would do themselves a big favor if they pay attention to these differences, and work through them with their husband or wife.



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